Being a fat ass takes a lot of work. You got to go on the internet, go to seamlessweb or delivery and then choose down the list of nearby vendors. You take a couple minutes thinking about what you’d like to swallow down in flavorless oil-congested gulps, and then an hour later you hate yourself.

To each their own but I thoroughly enjoy this routine. Today I actually left the house and sauntered over to Pearl’s Deluxe Burgers, which is located somewhere in the shitty Tenderloin area of downtown SF. It had a bunch of positive Yelp reviews so why not right? What you’re looking at above is a an order of Frings, which are just Fried Onion Rings and Fries together – which is pretty lame if you ask me, I hoped they invented something new like Onion rings with fried potato skin over them or some horrific but delicious amalgamation of beer batter. And a 1/4 pound Bula Burger, which is essentially your standard burger with a bunch of pineapple teriyaki sauce smothered all over it and some bacon pieces thrown in.

Sounds pretty good, but to be honest the results were so-so. the fries and onion rings were awesome simply on the basis of being like triple deep-fried (when in doubt, deep-fry yo shit). But the burger lacked something. I even threw in some fries and onion rings into the burger to overcompensate but alas, maybe my Asian side (my only side actually) knows teriyaki too well. It was a bit of a disappointment.

I’ll still eat it again tho.